Sung to the tune of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”.

You’d better log out. Don’t download that byte.
You’d better turn off your iPhone at night.
The internet is running our town!

It’s making a list and checking it twice
of every computer and smart phone device.
The internet is running our town!

They say resistance’s futile.
That you cannot avoid a life that’s full of tablets,
laptops, Blackberries and droids.
So watch what you write and watch what you say.
Once posted online, It forever will stay.
The internet is running our town!

It knows what you are typing to all your facebook peers.
It tracks your spending habits at the Gap, eBay and Sears.

So you’d better not click on any websites
for lingerie sales or sexual advice.
The internet is running our town!

You should also erase all personal files –
your diary and psychiatric profiles.
The internet is running our town!

It’s setting up dictators like Zuckerman and Gates.
It sent Steve Jobs to heaven so it could also run that place.

Don’t bother to vote for the left or the right.
It doesn’t care if you’re black or you’re white.
The internet is running our town!

No need to freak out. It’s too late to fight.
We’re stuck in the Matrix. No Neo in sight.
The internet is running our town!

Now don’t you think it’s creepy. We’re in a virtual void.
I’m not exaggerating and I’m not just paranoid.

No need to deny. No need to debate.
Our future is doomed to a digital fate.
The internet is running our town!

So be like Sarah Connor and train for judgement day.
The Terminator’s coming and he sure ain’t on a sleigh!

You’d better drop out. Live off of the grid.
Escape from the net. That’s what Santa Claus did.
The internet is running our town (Oh no!)
The internet is running out town (Get out!)
The IN-TER-NET is running our TOWWWNNN!!!!!

Happy Holidays Everyone!

(The kids and I also came up with “The 12 Snacks of Christmas” but it didn’t have quite the same bite 🙂